Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Please, Don't Try to Hold My Baby

What is it with people who think they have a right to hold and hug your baby? Who expect the child to be happy in any one's arms, or worse... who don't even care how the child feels about it, because they want a hug and they are going to get it anyway! Do you like it if someone gives you a major hug and you really don't feel like hugging them or anyone at that point? Why would a child be any different?

A does not like people  forcing him to do stuff, and especially not holding and hugging him against his will. We, his parents, don't do that, so he's more than a little baffled when others try it.  In this sense, he is very similar to a cat.  The cat-like children need time to get acquainted, you have to earn their interest and their trust. Just like with a cat, you need to play with A from a distance first and let him decide when he's ready to get closer. He will, if you give him time, and once he's decided he likes you, the rewards are amazing. But if you want a quick baby-fix, A is certainly not the child you are looking for.

I understand it's not mean spirited, that babies and little kids are cute and that you instinctively want to cuddle with them, but next time you get the urge, at least ask the parent if that's OK, they usually know how their child might react.

How does your child react to people wanting to hold and hug him/her? How do you handle it?

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